Relieving Tension
by Awsum Grammar Nazi
Summary: When Wonder Tweek finds out Super Craig may have a crush on him, he devises a plan (with help) to break his partner's emotionless facade. Hopefully it isn't too much pressure. Creek. Superhero AU. Part 3/3 of Cupid Cartman.


**Wasn't too confident about this one tbh. I'm sorry if it came out terrible.**

* * *

Wonder Tweek was a brilliant actor, provided Super Craig was there to support him, at least from the sidelines. Neither of them would admit it, but everyone else could see it plain as day; they belonged together, and it was time to make that a reality. Cartman watched their latest infiltration mission, sighing in annoyance. None of his plans to get them together had worked thus far. It was kind of embarrassing actually.

He could hear Craig instructing his partner through the earpiece. Wonder Tweek's disguised form moved carefully through the room The Coon had his eyes trained on. He deftly avoided people he would get sucked into talking to, with Craig's guidance. Reaching the back of the room, he finally spoke to the man who was obviously in charge. After leading the man away from the party, he quickly subdued him with a controlled shock of lightning. It was another open-and-closed job for the pair. Cartman pulled the binoculars from his eyes and stepped away from the ledge. He needed another plan.

* * *

Wonder Tweek slipped into Coon's, a strange calm settled over him. He was only ever this calm after listening to Craig. He wouldn't say it to the man himself. Super Craig couldn't handle communication, it was his kryptonite. It sucked, but Tweek could live with never talking out what he felt for the other. He almost felt a bit vindictive at that thought, though.

The Coon's sudden presence directly in front of him startled the blonde hero. He stumbled back in shock and his twitch was instantly back. " _Gah_! What do you want?" Tweek glanced around Cartman and locked eyes with Craig at their usual booth. He'd gotten him a coffee, how sweet. Tweek smiled in response, his calm returning.

"You're really breakin' my balls here Tweek, just ask him out already." His attention was instantly drawn back to The Coon. Their Union leader had his arms crossed and he looked vaguely unimpressed. Tweek's eye twitched. That expression always spelled out danger when it came to Eric Cartman.

"I can't do that!" Wonder Tweek whispered frantically, glancing again at his partner. Craig was starting to look a bit miffed. Nobody else could see it through the apathetic mask, but Tweek knew him well enough. "I gotta go." He squeaked out, attempting to dodge around The Coon. Cartman stuck his arm out and grabbed his wrist, Tweek immediately began to panic. "L-let me _Gah_ go!" he nearly screeched. Eric scowled, sensing the sharp glare on his back, and released Tweek from his grasp. Tweek scrambled over to Super Craig and guzzled down his coffee, shaking like a scared puppy. This was going to be harder than he thought.

Tweek was calmed quickly by the comforting hand on his thigh. He blushed. Now that his head was a bit more clear and a lot less paranoid, he felt a lot better and a lot embarrassed. The bartender had refilled his coffee cup for the third time on autopilot and Tweek almost felt confident enough to lean his head on Craig's shoulder. He refrained. Craig was a close friend, a _very_ close friend and that was that.

Super Craig took that moment to look up from his phone and lock eyes with the other hero. He smiled, and Tweek's blush only grew. He couldn't help the goofy grin he gave him in response. Craig didn't smile often, and he only did it for Tweek. It made him feel all warm and happy inside and crushed his constant stream of fears. Tweek wished he could tell him that.

The blonde let out a quiet yawn, and finally gave in to the desire to drop his head onto Craig's shoulder. He was on his fourth cup now, but it was doing little to deter his exhaustion. He watched the bar through half-lidded, tired eyes. People had begun slowly filtering out over the last several minutes, which meant it must be nearing 2am. It was illegal to sell alcohol between 2am and 8am, so the bar always got quiet around this time. One of the last to leave was ToolShed. He'd downed several drinks in the last hour alone, obviously trying to get in as much as he could before his time was up. That was worrisome. Tweek idly hoped he wasn't going on patrol after this. His eyes slipped shut just as the door closed behind the tool themed hero.

* * *

A sharp screech tore through the room as Tweek jolted awake. He was covered in sweat and shaking like a chihuahua in winter. That nightmare was back. Why was it back? An image of Craig, walking away as he faded into dust, stuck in the back of his mind on replay. He clenched his shirt hard, trying to force the panic down. He needed coffee. The blonde stumbled out of bed, belatedly noticing that he'd somehow ended up in pajamas and in his own house, as he made his way down the stairs. As Wonder Tweek, he was a fairly popular hero. This meant that he made enough to own a pretty decent house. Unfortunately, it also meant his bedroom was way too far from the coffee maker.

He twitched impatiently as the coffee brewed. He needed to get one of those Keurig things. Those worked faster right? The lack of caffeine was starting to be physically painful and he pulled the half-full pot out to poor himself a mug of the liquid, ignoring the mess as it continued to brew right onto the counter. His shaking slowed and the pain dispersed as he slurped down the drink.

Now that he was contentedly sipping at his favorite beverage, his mind wandered to the night before. He didn't remember coming home himself and, judging from the time, he had actually slept quite a bit longer than he normally would. Craig did wonders for his bad habits, that was for sure. He contemplated how Craig had actually gotten him home. He had never given him a key, even though he really probably should at this point. Tweek pictured the other hero carrying him to the door bridal style and feeling around his person for the key. A blush covered his cheeks at the thought. He really needed to get his mind out of the gutter. Craig was a _friend_ and that's all he'd ever be. Period.

Locking up his house and humming to himself, Tweek made his way to his parents' coffee shop. He liked to work there sometimes to take his mind off things and give them a hand. Plus, there was free coffee. He never could pass up free coffee.

The bell on the door jingled as he stepped into the shop. It was a small family-run business that had refused to become a chain. His parents weren't sell-outs, and he liked it that way.

It was less than an hour after he started working when _he_ showed up. Eric Cartman in all of his chubby glory strolled into Tweak Bros Coffee and plopped himself into a chair near the counter. Tweek tried to ignore his boss' presence, but was quickly thwarted when his mother told him he could go talk to him without him having asked. ' _Thank you mom!'_ he thought bitterly, then immediately felt bad. It's not like she _knew_ Cartman was a dick. " _Urgh!_ w-what do you want." The blonde grunted at him. He struggled to steady his hands and felt his whole body lurch in response.

"Oh nothing," Eric was grinning up at the twitching blonde. His brown hair was combed back professionally and he looked like he was ready for a business meeting… or a date. The whole prospect was terrifying, and Tweek couldn't stop the shudder that wracked him. "I just thought I could help you out with your… _boyfriend_." The brunette went on.

"I don't need any _Gah!_ help Cartman and he's not my _Urgh!_ my b-boyfriend." Tweek desperately wished he could latch onto the calm that Craig made him feel. If he could just hear his voice, he wouldn't be so uncontrollably twitchy. He contemplated calling him after this, just so he could relax a bit.

Cartman hadn't budged. In fact, his grin grew into a smirk. "Now Tweek, we all know you and Craig are totally gay for eachother. I just want to help a _friieeend_." He drew the last part of that statement out in a bit of a whine. Tweek was starting to remember how hopeless it was to try and tell Cartman no. The fat-ass always got what he wanted one way or another. "Just sayin' you guys don't exactly have to _talk_ about your feelings to form a relationship."

"What?!" Was the blonde's squawked out response. Tweek lifted his hands to pull at his hair. Whether it was in nerves or irritation, he wasn't sure.

"Well yeah, I mean, it's obvious to everyone else that you're gay for eachother. You just have to prove it to yourself right?" Cartman looked smug, like he'd just come up with the best idea in the world. "Tell ya what." He paused. "I'll go find you guys another infiltration job. While you're there, flirt a little more than necessary. Just see how he reacts. I swear to you Tweek, he is _so_ gay for you."

Tweek glanced away from him in thought, before deciding to give it a try. Cartman may be an asshole at times, but he occasionally did give decent advice. All he had to do was see if Craig got jealous, right? If he didn't, he could just brush it off like nothing out of the ordinary had happened. He could _totally_ do this. Hopefully it wasn't too much pressure.

Tweek turned back to Eric to agree to his plan, only to see that the other man was no longer focused on him. His eyes were glued to the TV in the nearest corner of the shop. Tweek caught the tail-end of a report about some hero drinking too much as he watched Cartman's eyes narrow dangerously. Whoever it was, was going to have a very terrifying day.

* * *

Super Craig frowned at the video feed on his laptop. Sure, they were the best suited team for infiltration missions. He just had to admit that it was a little surprising to have another one so soon. They'd literally just done one last night. He could hear Tweek's voice from the earpiece. He seemed even more jittery than normal. Craig caught himself wondering what was wrong, before stopping himself. That train of thought would get him nowhere. Tweek muttered something along the lines of "too much pressure" and that was where Craig drew the line.

"You know, if this one is too much right after the last, we can call it off." He tried not to let the concern show when his voice did little to calm the blonde. Wonder Tweek always refused to quit, no matter how stressful the job. Despite knowing this, he'd still wanted to make it clear that he _could_.

Craig watched as the blonde took as breath, forcing the calm, and slipped into the room. A reception desk stood to the right of the door, and Tweek made his way over. The heels from his disguise clicked against the ground and he came to a stop at the desk. Craig ignored the conversation with the receptionist, watching Tweek's posture instead. It held several different layers of flirty, and the dress didn't help.

Tweek shifted a bit closer, and Craig could see the man behind the counter blush as he handed him a key-card without a second thought. It wasn't as if it was something he'd never seen, but it still made him feel… anxious? Not that he'd say that aloud. He'd learned long ago not to listen in to the conversations. It's not as if he'd be any help with them anyways.

Craig flicked between the cameras, instructing Tweek where to go. That was when the unexpected happened. Tweek had been passing an office, mere feet before the one he had to go to, when he stopped. Craig watched as his partner swiveled toward the open office like he was doing a double-take, then tapped lightly on the door-frame. The man inside looked up and hurriedly invited the blonde in. "Hey," Tweek's voice was a few octaves higher and a lot more smooth than usual as he leaned attractively against the door frame. "I was just wondering if you could point me to your boss." He smiled. "I have a… meeting. With him." Tweek took a step inside the door and the man at the desk nearly fell out of his chair.

What the actual hell?! Super Craig had literally just pointed out the boss' office to him. What the fuck was Tweek doing?! He watched as the man responded in a stutter, and Tweek only moved closer, shaking his hips in a way that _had_ to be illegal. Craig gritted his teeth. This entire conversation was pointless. Just what was Tweek trying to pull?!

Tweek leaned in a bit to say something. It was too quiet for the earpiece to pick up. Craig's fingers dug into the table he was seated at, the metal warping from the force. He'd stationed himself at a park less than a block away from the building. He briefly debated going in to finish the job himself, but managed to hold back.

What happened next was what finally did it. Craig watched helplessly as Tweek leaned in even further and whispered something in the man's ear. The blonde's teeth caught on his ear-lobe for a fleeting moment as he pulled away, and the bastard had the audacity to _shudder_ in response. That was it. Craig had reached his breaking point and he was just _done_.

A growl sounded somewhere nearby and in the back of his mind he knew it came from him. Craig stood from the metal picnic table and sprinted toward the building. The door slammed open in his wake and he flipped the shocked receptionist off as he stomped past him. Rounding the corner and passing several offices in the same direction Tweek had gone, he quickly came across the open office.

Wonder Tweek watched in actual shock as Super Craig punched the other man with enough force to send him shooting through the brick wall and into the building on the opposite side of the street. His partner pivoted toward him, an intense glare on his face as he grabbed him by the wrist and dragged him out of the building. Had this plan actually worked?!

He got his answer when he was thrust against the outside wall of the building. Craig's lips were on his mere seconds after, and he suddenly couldn't think. All his brain could process was his partner's lips on his as he clutched desperately to the other man's jacket. Craig pulled away for air and it felt too soon. "You're mine."

The statement was growled out and Craig was staring at him possessively. He had to ask though. He had to be sure, because he knew his paranoia wouldn't leave him alone otherwise. "Does that make me your boyfriend then?" Tweek breathed out.

Super Craig froze, before a determined look filled his eyes, replacing the anger. It was the most expressive Tweek had ever seen him, and he was almost proud of himself. "If you want it to." Craig's voice was low, but not demanding. He wanted Tweek to know he wasn't forcing this on him if he didn't want it. It was sweet, and the blonde gushed internally about how adorable Craig could be.

"Yeah," Tweek smiled as he pulled Craig in for another kiss. "Yeah, I'd really like that."

* * *

Eric snickered triumphantly. For once, everything was going as planned. That was one couple down so far. He had hopes that the second one would be done in tonight, or by morning at the latest. He pulled back his binoculars and placed them in their case as he turned away from the pair of heroes.

That was when he saw it. Now that he was facing the park it was plain as day. Craig would have definitely noticed too if he hadn't been so focused on Tweek. The Coon fumbled to take out his phone, removing a glove and opening up the camera. He zoomed in on the two men making out in front of the tiny duck pond. It was exactly who he'd thought it was. His screen flashed briefly as the photo was taken, and he smirked down at it. It was as little blurry, but you could still tell who was in it, and that's what mattered.

* * *

Later that night, after they'd made their way back to the bar and Craig had excused himself to the bathroom, while Clyde frantically begged Bebe about an interview with Mysterion and Kenny called Dougie, Tweek pulled Eric aside and thanked him. He was grateful, because he would have never come up with that scheme himself. Now he had the man of his dreams, and it was almost better than a year's supply of free coffee. He giggled, Craig didn't need to know that part.


End file.
